I have always been easily influenced by society to do things that I don’t necessarily enjoy or like doing. I am an introvert who enjoys spending time indoors reading a book, learning new skills, journaling, and researching ways I can improve to be a better version of myself.
I prioritize living a healthy lifestyle, however, I find it a challenge when I am with my friends because I end up indulging in excessive alcohol and junk food. When I participate in activities that are not good for my health, they always feel good at the time I am doing them, but the consequences leave me feeling less myself afterward. Sometimes my body will require a couple of days to fully recover unless I do some sort of exercise which expedites the recovery process and help me to feel like myself again. I know I am not the only one who regrets after a night out of too much drinking and eating junk food.
When I exercise regularly and stick to a good diet, I feel good about myself, I can concentrate on a difficult task for a long period of time. Small things that would easily get me upset like when something goes wrong don't easily get me upset and my mood is stable most of the time. I feel a bit happy and confident that I can bear the difficult obstacles that life might throw my way.
In the book Designing your life, lessons on how to live a better life by Bill Burnett and Dave Evans, the authors wrote:
There are many versions of you, and they are all right, it is up to you to decide on how to live a better life that will bring a better version of yourself
How to not easily be influenced
- Don't feel bad about saying NO:
I certainly find it difficult to say no to someone. On some days, I want to stay in and read a book, work on my business or learn a new skill. I would randomly get a call from a friend inviting me to go out with them for a couple of drinks and a lot of times I would accept the invitation, forgetting that I had planned on doing some important things. The thought of having to explain to a friend why you don't want to go out with them seems to be a difficult thing to do for most people especially after you have picked up their phone call and they invite you on the spot. Some people don't understand when you try to pass on their invitation no matter the reason you give to them.
You need to trust yourself and have the confidence to say no even when it feels uncomfortable. If the person you are saying no to still does not understand, remember that it is their problem and not yours. Accept, whatever happens, and do not agonize over the decision you took for saying no. Saying no is not being rude and it is like any other answer. Once you have said no, you must trust that you have made the right decision.
2. When faced with two choices, take the path more painful in the short term:
If you have two choices to make and they’re relatively equal choices, take the path more painful in the short term — Naval Raviakant
Most choices that involve short-term pain have long-term gain associated with them. Let's take for example going to the gym. When you decline an invitation to go out with a friend to drink and decide to rather go to the gym and workout, you suffer in the short term because you feel the weakness leaving your body in a form of pain. In the long-term, you are better off because you are healthier.
3. Understand the long-term consequences of your actions:
It is only through understanding the long term consequences of our actions that we find true wisdom.
Let's use eating excessive junk food as an example. Your health slowly deteriorates. Someone who has the wisdom to know the long-term consequences of a bad diet will find it easier to choose to stick to a good diet.
4. Change the way you see yourself and the way you respond to the world around you:
A big part of not being easily influenced is the way you see yourself. If you are confident in who you are and the values you hold, even though you are guaranteed to be influenced from time to time, most of the time you will win the battle to not easily be influenced by society.
5. Be the driver of your own life:
When you are in the driving seat of your life, whether your own decisions turn out good or bad, for better or for worse, at least it won't be because you allowed someone to influence you to do something that you know is not good for you.
